Jokes about matches:
Full match says to the burnt one:
- I told you that scratching your head is a bad habit!
Newer do leave small children alone with matches. This will inevitably result in tragedy.
Four small children of a cobbler Soler were left home alone, found matches and began to play with them.
By the time parents came home they put up a very dirty word from them!
- What for the manager of the Supersafety match factory was decorated with the Order of British Empire?
- German saboteur tried to fire the mine under the Buckingham Palace with their matches and was caught because he cursed too loud unable to ignite any.
Gerostratus favourite proverb:
Matches is not a childrens toy, but the possibility to enter into the History
We are also proposing disposable wooden one-time lighters, also known as matches.
One very conservative German scientist did not allow to install electricity in the house. He writes his manuscripts using kerosene lamp. His wife tried to convince him:
- You are always angry because cannot find matches when it's dark. If we have electricity you will be able to switch on the light and easily find them.
The scientist agreed:
- Well, I see that the electricity may be useful sometimes.
Chukcha tests the new box of matches:
- If the mach does not give fire after first strike, he throws it away;
- If it burns - he accuratly blows it out and puts back in the box.
Dear friends! A lady from our toun was put to the Guinnes book as the owner of the biggest matcbox collection!!
You all know her very well - that is Maria Balashova, she collects faeces tests in our local clinic for more than 20 years ...